An Open Letter to the Spineless Parents in Aisle 5

by David


I know that action figure with the totally awesome sword is calling your kid’s name, but you need to straighten up and tell them “no.”  They have managed, in their brief little tantrum, to bother not only me, but also everything within a five mile radius with ears.

The horror, the horror!

I don’t understand it; I could see it coming from a mile away.  Your child saw the action figure, in its shiny box, from 3 aisles away.  3.  That’s when the whimpering began; the lower lip began to quiver, in anticipation of the Oscar-winning performance that was quickly to follow.  He looked at you with his beautiful “you can’t possibly say no” blue eyes, and said, “I want it.”

Then all hell broke loose.  As I watched, people came running, thinking that your child had gotten his leg caught in an industrial shredding machine, or had witnesses the death of a beloved pet.  Instead, you had told him no.

What perhaps was more interesting, however, was your child’s ability to call your bluff.  He believed, no, knew, that if he began wailing, and yes, kept wailing, you would eventually capitulate.  And you did.  In a record 2 minutes of ear-splitting shrieking, you gave in.  Handed the toy right over.

I’m not going to push all of the blame on you, though, as your child was the one constantly begging, but you are the one constantly giving into his incessant pleading and whining, waiting for another tantrum to hit so you can shut him up with a toy or a big cookie.  Why on this planet you find it justified to constantly cave into your kid’s efforts, I just don’t know.

You don’t want your kids growing up to be pleading fools for the rest of their lives, do you?  Fix it now before it gets worse; not everyone gets everything he or she wants.  So tell them to put down their toys, those shiny bouncy balls and Beach Barbies, and pick up a book.

Wishing for Deafness and Blindness,

Unsympathetic Bystander




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